If I had been writing this a few weeks ago, I would tell you that I was stuck in my own personal hell. That everything I wanted changed made no sense, and that I couldn't justify any of my decisions in the past half year. I came home to visit my family in September and made a drastic change in my life: I moved back to Ottawa. Am I still with the man I claim to love? Absolutely. Am I moving forward with my life? Most definitely!
Since July, my whole world as I know has changed... and I'm not going to lie, part of it was nightmarish. The job I had transferred didn't work out for me, I missed Jordan painfully much, and I was so unhappy. It wasn't until I was sitting in Jordan's parents kitchen in early January, talking to his mom that I realized that leaving school had left this void in my heart that nothing could fix. I didn't feel proud of myself, I didn't feel very accomplished... so I did what I had to do, and sent in a Return to Studies form!
So I am back to school in May, I'm going to finish my undergrads degree and then the plan is to go into a Public Relations program and go from there! I am really excited, except the part where no one will respect my decision of going back to finish my degree because apparently I'm "not cut out for it". I have had an incredible amount of self doubt eat at me for months and months and this is where I am drawing the line!
I started a new job this week. A new job where the people seem to have quite a bit of faith in me, and I feel really empowered by that. I feel like I can do it. I feel like I am in control. As the woman who has been training me the last couple days would say, I am currently "The Little Lion Who Roared!"
